I’m a single mother for 20 years. My son is 22. I won’t talk about my ex-husband. I can’t go down that road right now. I’m in a pretty good mood, considering.
My son is 22 now and I haven’t stopped being Mom to him. I didn’t let him go. To his credit, he wants to go. At least he does most of the time. There is always a push and a pull sort of dynamic to these situations. Sometimes he wants me to help him with something and I help him even when I shouldn’t.
But honestly, I am tapped out. I am so very tired and part of that reason is because I worry about my 22 year old son and I try to make sure everything will be okay. I’ve made myself crazy and I haven’t made him any happier in the process.
My son is in town right now. I thought he would come by if only to give me the spare car key he accidentally took back with him to school. Instead, he’s been doing some job downtown. What job? I’m not entirely certain. How much is he getting paid for working 24 hours straight? He says he doesn’t know.
It’s crossed my mind that maybe he is selling crack on a street corner downtown. But that isn’t really a rational thought.
So, he didn’t come by yesterday and in spite of believing, at first, that I was upset because he was being irresponsible, 8 hours later I was in tears. I am afraid of losing him. What if he leaves and never comes home.
Then it occurred to me that you don’t raise kids so that they will please you. I mean, isn’t that what my pre-historic ancestors did? You really do raise them and set them free.
I’m going to give that a whirl.